No excuses

I've been working with National Family Week over the last couple of weeks. They've just done a survey which has highlighted that the average family spends just 49 minutes together every day, adding up to about 6 hours a week in total. Shocking! I can't believe that as a nation we aren't able to do better than that.

Yes, we all have time constraints. Yes, we are all very busy, (particularly our children with the myriad of after-school school activities that are on offer). But 49 minutes? I can only assume that although we may all be under the same roof for many, many more minutes, we are not in the same room, doing the same thing. What's more likely is that we are all glued to different screens in different corners of the house, in our own solitary worlds, bumping into each other for the occasional meal, the occasional break from our beloved technology.

It's a simple thing to remedy. You just have to make being in the same room more fun than typing on social networking sites using as many indecipherable abbreviations as you can, or collecting thousands of gold coins on a purple scooter dressed as a cyber-hedgehog. A bit of effort, a bit of imagination, and a bit of humour is all you need. So no excuses. Try playing any of the games on this blog if you're stuck.

If you need to get out of the house, away from household chores and the temptation of screentime in order to get your family minutes up, then make the most of National Family Week during the upcoming half-term. There are over five thousand events planned, most of them free, across the country. So once again, no excuses. Visit their website http://www.nationalfamilyweek.co.uk/ to find out what's happening in your area.

GMTV clips

Just wanted to let readers know that lots of my ideas were recently included in eight separate mini-films shown on GMTV during the Easter holidays. They are still accessible via their website so click on this link to check them out. http://www.gm.tv/lifestyle/families-and-parenting/47508-polly-beard-raising-kids-parenting-advice.html

My own lovely children, plus a fantastic motley collection of nieces, nephews, godchildren and other willing friends helped make filming these clips an absolute pleasure. The fun and spontaneity of a game can easily get lost when you have to reshoot a section over and over again, but my little helpers were amazingly patient and understanding. So huge thanks to Ella, Joe, Betty, Alfie, Hazel, Jared, Emma, Eddie, Dan and Jack. All stars, the lot of you.

Are We Nearly There Yet?

Car journeys can be SO long and boring, particularly at the moment when going any faster than 10 miles an hour in the snow and ice seems downright foolish. If you're unlucky enough to get stuck in a jam and have very fidgety children in the back, or just fancy a game to help pass the time, here are some of my faves you might like to try.

With Ding Dong Splat!, one of you tells a story and everyone else does the sound effects. It doesn't matter what your story is about, but tales of spooky houses or trips to the farmyard always keep everyone going for ages. Be sure to include good noisy things such as footsteps, thunder, laughing, sneezing, police sirens, farting pigs and a trumpet fanfare. Make sure everyone has a go at being the storyteller.

A good one for a jam is Who Are You And What Do You Do? Take a good look at any person in a nearby car, and try to imagine what their name is, what they do for a job, whether they are happy or sad and why, which football team they support, whether they have ever been told off by a policeman, what they got for Christmas, etc. This is also great on a train journey as long as other passengers don't catch you staring at them.

And if you're still bored, get rid of some of your frustration with a bit of Car-Drumming. Twiddle the radio tuner until you stumble upon some suitable music - anything with a solid drum beat will do. Then get drumming with imaginary drumsticks and an imaginary drum kit around you complete with cymbals and percussion accessories. Shake your hair in front of your eyes and pout, then get drumming. Wink rock-star style now and then into an imaginary camera. Be careful not to poke anyone in the eye or hit the front seats otherwise they may just show their nastier rock-star temperament!

Santa's Little Helpers

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought it might be handy to share a few thoughts when it comes to shopping with kids in tow.

First off, make sure you have a realistic head on. There are three basic facts about shopping with children. You are not going to get nearly as much done as you hoped you would, you will undoubtedly end up spending more money than you would do if shopping alone, and everyone will get tired and testy at some point, you included. If you accept these inevitabilities from the outset rather than fear or fight them, the day won't be nearly as bad as you were expecting.

The first problem is easy to tackle. Start by going through your list, crossing out anything that isn't essential. Then when you're out and about, don't be a perfectionist. "That'll do!" is an excellent phrase to be repeated.

To keep costs down, take some bottles of water and a few snacks to cut down on those sudden attacks of thirst and hunger that can become irritatingly expensive. Saying that, a sit-down with a hot chocolate is a damn good reward or bribe - however you want to play it.

Tired and testy is a harder nut to crack. But here are a couple of games to try which might help make shopping a bit more fun for everyone:

Alphabet I-Spy - The first person looks around and names something they can spy-with-their-little-eye beginning with an A. The next person calls outs something beginning with a B, next person C, and so on. Depending on the age of the players, impose a ten second time limit to come up with a word, and the letters Q, X and Z can be left out. If you go around the alphabet more than once, take care not to repeat any words.

Celebrity Spotting - Older children adore this and it's very good for breaking up any teenage tension. Look out for any look-alikes. So for instance, a old man wearing an orangish wig? Why, it's Elton John of course. A thin woman with dark hair, high heels and sunglasses. Well, I never did! It's Victoria Beckham! Two small lads seemingly joined at the shoulders - Ant and Dec!

The Imitation Game - A good one for queues. Look at the person standing in front of you (assuming they have their back turned towards you). Try to copy everything they do without them noticing, whether it's shuffling about on their feet, fishing around in their pockets for a wallet, whistling, exhaling loudly, answering their mobile phone, etc. Be as bold as you dare, and if you raise their suspicions by mistake, just smile nicely and wish them a Merry Christmas.

Good luck!

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night....

Winter is most definitely around the corner. Gusting winds have blown any remaining autumn leaves off the trees, torrential rain has signalled the arrival of the perma-puddle in our driveway that will now stay with us until drier weather arrives in May, but perhaps most depressing of all are the darker mornings and evenings.

Pitch-black mornings aren't too much of a challenge for parents (once you've managed to extract children away from their warm duvets). Once you're up, you're up and there never seems to be too much time to mope around. It's the afternoons and evenings that tend to be trickier. Post-school, there seems to be about twenty minutes daylight before the gloom descends. Afternoon and evening blend into one and tend to drag on, and on, and on. So, if you're in need of a few pointers to help relieve the winter blues boredom, here are some thoughts.

Hold a Construction Olympics during the week. Each night, any bored child must build an object of your choice within a specified time using Lego, K’nex or any other such toys lying idle in tubs. On the first two nights, set a timer for fifteen minutes whilst they create something simple like a plate of chips or a church. Increase the timer to thirty minutes for a mid-week rocket or robot. Allow an hour on Friday evening for a more challenging project like a secret spy den or a boat that can fly. Every day when time is up, they should present their sculptures explaining any buttons or special features. Award points out of ten for both ingenuity and looks and keep a running score. If they’ve managed to notch up over 50 points by the end of the week, treat them to something special at the weekend.

It’s not too ridiculously early for Celebrity Santa either. Let them search the internet for images of their favourite TV characters, footballers, or X-Factor judges and print them out on the computer. Cut around the figures or faces and stick on to the front of a piece of folded card. Now for the fun bit – give all of them a Santa makeover. You’ll need to glue on cotton wool beards and red hats of course, but a touch of glitter on John Terry’s shirt or some antlers on Bart Simpson’s skateboard will also add to the disguise. Accumulate and keep safe over the next few weeks, then hand out to school friends at the end of term.

If anyone is still kicking their heels, put them in charge of supper. That’ll be scrambled eggs on toast for four, please.

Leaf Me Alone!

I wondered if a few autumnal activities for 9-12 year-olds might help other parents out there with a troublesome "tween" on their hands. It's at this age that their independence starts to really kick in (a good thing), but sadly kids often haven't got a clue how to handle it (an understandable thing) and end up talking to you as if you were their absolute worst enemy (definitely a bad thing). Sometimes a blast of fresh air and a quick five minutes doing something completely different can be just what's needed to break up any brewing tensions.

Look to autumn leaves for inspiration. First off, stand under a tree and have a go at Catching Wishes. As the leaves come fluttering down, try to catch one. This is much harder than it sounds as leaves are a bit like supermarket trolleys and have a directional mind of their own. For each leaf that you get, you can make a wish. This is best done out loud so that you can get plenty of ideas for Christmas presents. Hmmmm, now will it be world peace or an ipod touch.....?

Next, get them to collect a few leaves with good, strong, bumpy veins on them. Go for a couple of different varieties. If they haven't tried leaf-rubbing for a few years, then encourage them to revisit it. It's strangely calming and satisfying which could be just what they need right now. If they think this is all too babyish, or have indeed thrown all their wax crayons away in favour of fancy felt-tips, get the silver foil out. For a shimmering alternative, just cover the leaf with foil and rub over with a bare finger.

And lastly, something a little more active. Get some sticky tape and carefully wrap some, sticky side facing outwards, around heads, wrists, thighs and ankles. Select some leaves (horse chestnut are particularly good for headdresses) and press down on to the tape. Once you have transformed yourselves into leaf warriors, perform a stamping, shouting, shaking tribal dance to dispel any remaining anger.

However big and bad they are trying to be, remember that they are only little.

Do I Really Say That?

The Imitation Game has many strengths. It keeps everyone seated for longer at the table during mealtimes, it is pretty much guaranteed to get you all laughing, it challenges the whole family and makes you use your creativity. But above all, it makes you realise just how ridiculous you can sound sometimes, and gives you an important nudge to change your ways.

Everyone has a number of pieces of paper, say ten or fifteen each, and a different colour pen. Take a few minutes to scribble down the name of someone you all know - a member of the family, a relative, a neighbour, teacher, celebrity, pet, friend, etc. - one name per piece of paper. Fold all the papers up and chuck them into a bowl, then place them in the centre of the table.

The first player starts by picking a name out of the bowl. They announce the colour of the pen its been written in, so that the author knows to keep quiet for this particular round. Player one then gives their finest impression of the person whose name is on the paper. Whoever correctly guesses first wins the piece of paper and the bowl is passed to the next player for another impression. Keep going until the bowl is empty, then count up all the papers and declare a winner.

So, impressions may include the following:-

1) "That was, quite honestly, one of the worst auditions we have ever seen. Seriously. A nightmare. And your eyes are freaky".... Simon Cowell, naturally.

2) "Philip and I are deeply honoured to be so rich and so horsey".... The Queen.

3) "Right! That is IT!! I am the only person who ever bothers to clean anything in this house!!".... Apparently this is me.

How much do I want to be remembered for this kind of thing? Not at all. Not one itsy-bitsy-bit. It's not even a true statement. The kids do tidy their rooms (every once in a while). It's obviously time for me to chill out about the mess. Or maybe just get a cleaner?